Sphere Eluding...


...I've decided to come up with a cooler, more professional name for Dodgeball. Sphere Eluding. Well...either that, or Orb Avoid. Or maybe Ditchglobe? I dunno, maybe I'm reaching.

Dodgeball is a good name I guess. It's definitely a good game. I'm proud to say that I'm the owner of at least one good idea in my lifetime. That idea was men's dodgeball. For over a year now we've been renting a little gymnasium and gathering anywhere from 15-30 guys to play a couple hours of ferocious dodgeball every Sunday night. Dodgeball isn't a new idea, but what's different with our dodgeball session is that we play with dangerous brutality.

We don't use the "regulation" full-sized, wouldn't-hurt-if-it-fell-off-a-building-and-landed-on-your-head, foam balls that actual dodgeball leagues use. Those balls are for ninnies.
We bring the pain.

The funny thing about our dodgeball is that it's opened the door for many people to get connected with God. Guys from all over the place show up for dodgeball...guys who would never set foot in a church. Time and time again they show up and after the group of dodgeball players show them that they're real men who have fun AND happen to love Jesus, they end up coming to church. It's been an amazing opportunity to show people the love of Christ...oddly enough by smashing them in the face with a rubber ball. God is weird like that.

I brought Tony with me to dodgeball tonight. Tony is 15, and he works at the hobby store with me. I've known him since he was about 5 I guess and he never really says much. He's a teenager. He either mumbles or he whines. I told him I was picking him up tonight for dodgeball and he was all for it. I picked him up and he was his shy, normal, teenager-y self. After dodgeball though something broke...Tony was talking up a storm and he was asking me questions and telling me stories and kind of acting like a real human. Once again the mysterious power of dodgeball has opened up some kind of door. Schweet.

God is telling me that I'll be the person to open the door for Jesus in Tony's life. We'll see.

I love dodgeball. It's so many things to me:

* A healthy outlet to vent anger or frustration.
* Proof that I do guy stuff too and not just gardening, cooking, and stampin' up. I mean...I don't do stampin' up...that's for women only! I do not do that kind of thing!
You should see my new Valentine's Day Bundle I picked up from cincymoms.com!! It's so totally fab!! Love, love, LOVE it!!
* A work out like you wouldn't believe.
* Connection for guys who aren't ready for church.
* Guaranteed sympathy from onlookers...the occasional black eye is great for attention!!

If you'd like to play some serious dodgeball in the Cincinnati area...lemmeknow!
Just remember, we play for reals yo.




8 waggish utterances thus far...:

mandy said...

dodgeball - it HAS to be a guy thing.

i hated dodgeball as a kid and don't think the game would get me in the door!

but i'm SO glad that its working for the guys out there.
praise God!

melanie said...

I so totally want to go and hover and make everyone hold hands and sway back and forth and sing until the urge to hurt each other passes. Can't you play nice?

Ryan Allen Doan said...

I would recommend softer balls. They hurt.

Helen Ann said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Helen Ann said...

(oops! had a typo in that last one!)

I like the name "Ditchglobe" :)

But I HATE the game...I was always the dorky kid who was picked last and then the first to be chased after and slammed with the ball. Hell for me would be an endless game of dodgeball.

Still, I guess if God can send an evil spirit to do his bidding (Judges 9:23) he can send a dodgeball into someone's face to show them His love! :) Yep - Weird, Wonderful God!

DanThoms said...

5 Reasons why I will not play Dodgeball with you guys
5) The head shot that turned your left eye black and blue
4) All of the stories about being hit... um... you know where
3) The head shot that turned your right eye black and blue
2) I like to keep my blood on the inside of my body.
1) see answers 1-4

Steve said...

Dan is very wise.

Anonymous said...

Ahahahahahaha! Loved this post, I laughed so much :)
"Foam balls... are for ninnies" "dangerous brutality" "bring the pain", harharhar!

I generally detest watching people get hurt, but as you all seem to enjoy this specific type of pain so much... might actually be fun to WATCH one of your games :)
(I even managed to laugh at that final photo... owwww!)

Change the name to 'OrbAvoid'. Sounds futuristically cool.