I had to drop by Sam's Club (my favorite store) today to grab a few life supplies. You know, Pretzel Crisps, Sippy Cups, 4lbs of Butter, Pumpkin Spice Coffee Creamer...just the bare necessities of course. I wouldn't be caught dead buying things that weren't essential to my life.

What I'm amazed by is that there seems to be an unstoppable force of a screaming child in Sam's Club at least 8 out of 10 times that I'm in there. What...is...the...deal?

When I was little, If I pulled something like that I would have been given something to really cry about. I was in the store for about thirty minutes and I could hear this kid wailing for the entire half hour. I can't help being nosey and I had to go see what this kid looked like. I always have to check out the offender of any public annoyance. Doesn't everyone do that?

So this kid is probably 3 or 4 years old, but he seems to contain the nuclear energy of the Incredible Hulk. What's the kid's mom doing about the situation? You guessed it...not a dang thang. She's got that distant, "I'm a failure of a human being and I couldn't care less" look in her eyes. It's not looking like anyone is going to break into this child's life with a reality slap anytime soon.

The pinnacle of my shopping experience was of course the check-out lane. Where is the screaming menace of a small human at this time? Well right in the next lane over of course...how could there be another possibility? It just wouldn't make sense any other way.

I must have been concentrating a little bit too hard at making him gag with my telekinetic powers because a guy in front of me broke my mind- force with this little nugget..."You'll be there too some day. I've got a little guy at home about his age and they all do that. You just have to let them have their way or else it will never end."

I said to the guy, "Wow. Thank you for changing my parenting life with that incredible insight. I might be able to write a book now...I have been given the key to knowledge and astuteness when it comes to caring for my offspring. You sir, are a gentleman and a scholar."

Okay so I didn't actually say that...but, I thought it several hours later when I was in front of my computer.